Watson 110s, Part III

There is nobody else quite like my dear suitemate JS. JS had many interests, including Russian, music, and math. In fact, he was so interested in those three subjects that he applied to major in all of them, in addition to the engineering degree he was pursuing. However, his greatest interest of all was eBay. According to the mailroom workers, he received the most packages out of everyone in the entire first year class. Included in these packages was a pair of tasers, one for me and one for him. He also ordered me a katana, a request inspired by my obsession with the movie Kill Bill. Our suite was not exactly a model for safety.

What JS purchased for himself, however, was much more interesting. For example, being a member of the Cavalier Marching Band and an avid marching band fan in general, he ordered 30 different band uniforms from various vendors. He declared February "Marching Band Month," during which he wore a distinct outfit each day.

Like many first years, JS was only recently becoming aware of his limits when it came to alcohol intake. One night, he came back to the dorm so drunk that he took off all of his clothes and passed out, naked, on the bathroom floor. DP, being the kind and humane roommate that he was, took a picture of JS's embarrassing condition, printed out several copies, and taped them up on every door in the suite. Needless to say, JS and DP didn't get along very well for the rest of the year.

JS, I can't believe I consented to live another year with you. May your future be bright, and may you use your astronomical intelligence for good and not evil.