SS, another member of my first year suite, was an international student from India. He seemed quiet and reserved at first, but his friendliness won me over, and we were pretty good friends by the end of the year. However, it turned out that SS was also someone who believed everything he read on the internet. One day, he read an article that said that it was medically beneficial to poop only once a day. From then on, he would hold in his poop from the moment he woke up until after we came back from dinner. Needless to say, when he finally went, the bathroom would smell so awful that nobody would be able to use it for another half hour. Despite our protests, SS refused to change his habits.
In addition to having a god-like control of his external anal sphincter, SS also had an absurd ability to sleep. It's much easier to count the number of classes he attended than to count the number that he missed. He would often sleep more than 12 hours a day, which was remarkable, given that he never physically exerted himself. It's also an understatement to say he slept; rather, he would have daily comas. Once, we set off the fire alarm in his room to see if that would wake him up. That was when we discovered that if there were ever a fire in Watson, SS would surely perish in the flames.
SS, I respect you and envy your ability to sleep through an earthquake, tsunami, and bear attack, all at the same time. May our paths cross again soon.
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